Strong Couples Club

Consider spending your date night taking a personality assessment

Personality is stable throughout life, so don’t expend energy in your relationship trying to change your partner’s personality, instead put in effort to understand each other’s personality factors as well as your own.

Changing aspects of your partners personality is largely a misconception

Personality is simply understood as the set of characteristics that lead to consistent patterns of feeling, thinking and behaving. It is one of those things in life that can't change and it tends to stay stable over time. Some might argue you can change aspects of your personality, or your partner’s if you try hard enough. However, this is largely a misconception. What you can do is begin to understand your own personality as well as your partner’s.

Having very different personalities can bring challenges for couples

There are many personality theories and concepts that can help you understand your own personality and your partners. PREPARE/ENRICH uses SCOPE to help individuals see how high or low they score on each of the five factors of personality (Social, Change, Organised, Pleasing and Emotionally calm).

Insight into personality can help strengthen relationship skills

Personality is simply understood as the set of characteristics that lead to consistent patterns of feeling, thinking and behaving. It is one of those things in life that can't change and it tends to stay stable over time.

Conflict is inevitable: Make a commitment to evaluate your next conflict

Conflict is inevitable in relationships, but if dealt with in a healthy, productive, and respectful way, it can bring you closer as a couple and make your relationship stronger.

How does non-verbal communication contribute to dealing with conflict?

Pride, bias, and defensive mechanisms prevent us from dealing with conflict in a healthy, productive manner. But it doesn’t have to be that way. There are strategies you and your partner can use to effectively deal with conflict in your relationship.

If the argument starts to get out of hand, ask for a "time out"

If the argument starts to get out of hand, ask for a "time out." Taking 5 to 20 minutes away from your partner will calm you enough to allow you to listen better and discuss the subject objectively rather than emotionally. Soothe yourself by taking deep breaths, a short walk, or even a short drive.

Communicate assertively and take responsibility for your own feelings

When conflict arises, try to avoid using blameful language towards your partner as this invites negativity into the situation. Try to communicate assertively and take responsibility for your own feelings and actions, and try to focus solely on the issue at hand.

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