| MAIN ARTICLES IN THIS ISSUE • THE
NEW CUSTOMIZED VERSION OF PREPARE IS HERE
• SOME PRACTICAL COMMENTS TO ASSIST USERS OF THE CUSTOMIZED VERSION • WHAT IS THE FUTURE OF VERSION 2000 AND THE AUSTRALIAN OFFICE? • SETTING THE
MARITAL STAGE
END-OF-YEAR HOLIDAY OFFICE CLOSING The Australian National Office will close on Friday 18th December 2009 and reopen on Monday 11th January 2010. (Online processing will still be available during this period) THE NEW CUSTOMIZED VERSION OF PREPARE IS HERE As we noted in the previous newsletter, a new online version of the Prepare-Enrich materials was to be introduced into Australia late in 2009. We launched the new version in mid-September this year and already over 350 Australian couples have experienced the new version and the feedback from couples and Administrators has been highly favourable. The feedback is very similar to that reported in the USA after the Customized Version was introduced early in 2009: • It is very
easy to
navigate and use online
• The Facilitator's Report is more detailed and yet easier to read • The new Couple's Report is a very helpful resource • The Couple's Workbook with over 20 exercises is an excellent resource The new version is called Prepare-Enrich: The Customized Version. It was first released for use in the USA in January 2009. The Australian version has been tailor-made for local use. The new version is only available online. Instead of the five versions we have in the previous hard copy Version 2000, we now have the potential for, literally, many hundred versions of PREPARE-ENRICH. The Customized Version is based on background questions the couple answers about their relationship. The first main category is the stage of their relationship - whether they are dating, engaged or married. Additional questions relate to their age, cultural and religious differences and whether there are children involved in the relationship. Depending on the answers to these questions the Customized Version creates the most relevant variety of scales for a particular couple. The Australian office mailed Version 2000 Administrators in stages from late August 2009 to inform them that the new version is available and exactly how to begin using it. All current Version 2000 Administrators have had an account set up so they can begin using the Customized Version. Please note that this does not include your email address, so you need to enter and confirm it when you first log in. Until you do this you will not receive any notifications of your couples having completed the inventory online. If you have not already done so you may download a Transition Manual that will provide more detail and help you in the process from our website at: SOME PRACTICAL COMMENTS TO ASSIST USERS OF THE CUSTOMIZED VERSION Drop-outs and crashes The system is set up so that responses are saved screen by screen and the responses are not totally lost if the internet falls out or the computer crashes when a person is quite a way into completing the questions. If they lose their connection they should login again and will be able to take up where they left off. If any answers have been lost (usually items on the screen when the crash occurred) they cannot be retreived, but they are usually few in number, so they should just continue on regardless. Changing answers Some couples have mentioned that they would like to be able to go back and change an answer occasionally. With the previous paper and pencil version they could of course just erase an answer and enter a new one, but allowing complete review and alteration of over 200 answers would make the process too long and would encourage over-analysis (first reactions are usually more reliable than those made after too much rumination). Encourage couples to review their answers on the screen before they move on to the next screen of questions. Core Scale Scores The new facilitator's report provides, for the core scales, a 'satisfaction' histogram for each partner and provides a qualitative scale beside it ranging from very low to very high. For Version 2000 Administrators, these are the old 'revised scores' which in fact are percentile scores revised in accordance with the individual's idealistic distortion scores. Frequently Asked Questions A link for a downloadable PDF file with FAQ and answers may be found on the login page for the Customized Version. We urge you to make use of this resource. WHAT IS THE FUTURE OF VERSION 2000 AND THE AUSTRALIAN OFFICE? It is our intention that Version 2000 will continue to be available for up to three years (until late 2012) as long as demand warrants this. Those trained in Version 2000 may use either the Customized Version or Version 2000 during that period, the choice depending on your preference for a particular couple. Please remember to use your Version 2000 Administrator code and the appropriate Version 2000 couple number if you are administering Version 2000. The Australian National Office will continue to provide local customer service, and website and training resources, as well as maintaining regular Version 2000 processing. The staff profile is unchanged. SETTING THE MARITAL STAGE: The First Two Years in Marriage are Critical As the topic of matrimonial success and divorce is studied more and more, research is showing that how a couple weathers their first two years together can make or break their marriage. A study, "The Connubial Crucible: Newlywed Years as Predictors of Marital Delight, Distress, and Divorce" by Ted L. Huston, John P. Caughlin, Renate M. Houts, Shanna E. Smith, and Laura J. George was published in The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (2001; 80:237-252). According to Dr. Huston of the University of Texas at Austin, "This study showed that couples' newlywed marriages and changes in their union over the first 2 years foreshadow their long-term marital fate after 13 years... disillusionment—as reflected in an abatement of love, a decline in overt affection, a lessening of the conviction that one's spouse is responsive, and an increase in ambivalence—distinguishes couples headed for divorce from those who establish a stable marital bond." The researchers discovered "differences between the happily married and unhappily married groups were apparent right after they tied the knot." The study looked at 156 couples who were married for the first time in 1981. Researchers discovered that after 13 years: • 68 couples were happily married
• 32 couples were unhappily married • 56 couples had divorced The couples who divorced within the first two years showed signs of disillusionment and were negative toward one another in the first two months of their marriage. It is a sign of trouble if a newlywed couple starts to have disillusionment within the first year. The couples who are still happily married are couples who were able to have positive feelings about their spouse in the first two years...A top priority for newlyweds should be keeping romance alive. Other priorities a couple needs to face the first year include how to allocate and handle money, who's going to do what chores, ways to spend free time, finding time to have sex, dealing with in-laws, understanding differences including spirituality, learning how to deal with conflict, and discussing expectations. Couples need to watch for these red flags: • lack of romance and intimacy
• inability to have fun together • selfishness • fear of conflict • lack of respect • over commitment of time to other things • over spending • too much dependence on parents • sexual problems • addictions and/or substance abuse • emotional and/or physical abuse • unrealistic expectations • married before age 20 Although the first couple of years are said to be the most difficult, they are often remembered as the most joyous. They can be a tremendous time of intimacy and discovery. There is so much to learn about one another and so much to express to one another. The newlywed stage of marriage ... can build the foundation and set the stage for a life-long, meaningful marriage. Authors: Sheri & Bob Stritof are the Marriage Guides for the website about.com. This article was taken from about.com by Prepare-Enrich (USA) with their permission and is presented here in a slightly abbreviated form. MAREAA: REMINDER - THE NEW WEBSITE Marriage and Relationship Education is an adult education activity designed to inform and enrich relationships and individuals. Members of MAREAA (Marriage and Relationship Educators’ Association of Australia) facilitate programs for individuals, couples, families and groups of all ages. Programs may include preparation for marriage, skills for strengthening relationships, school programs, parenting, stepfamilies, men’s issues, workplace relationships, personal development, conflict management, rebuilding after separation or divorce. MAREAA is a body of enthusiastic, dynamic, creative group of educators. They are committed to encouraging and equipping people to achieve fulfilling relationships. MAREAA aims to support educators in their ongoing professional development through networking, in service training opportunities, conferences, sharing of resources plus much more. MAREAA has active members in most states and territories, For more information about MAREAA see the website at: CONFLICTED COUPLES - AN AUSTRALIAN RESOURCE STUDY As shown in the previous article, there can be little doubt that the experience of family of origin is an important area for investigation among couples taking PREPARE. A booklet by Dr Alan Craddock (National Coordinator of PREPARE-ENRICH Australia and Honorary Senior Lecturer in the School of Psychology, The University of Sydney) has been written solely for PREPARE-ENRICH Administrators. This booklet is entitled Origins: Family Experiences of premarital Couples and has three main aims: 1. To identify the different types of premarital couples in a large national sample of Australian couples participating in the PREPARE program. In particular, the aim is to identify and explore the main differences between highly satisfied (vitalised) and more troubled (conflicted) premarital couples. 2. To examine the differences in family background of vitalised versus conflicted premarital couples in the National sample. Of major interest is any link between negative experiences within family of origin in the past (separateness, rigidity and exposure to abuse) and present difficulties in couple relationship. 3. To explore the practical implications of these findings, particularly when working with conflicted premarital couples. General strategies for working with conflicted couples are also described. The study represents the drawing together of trends and patterns identified in the data from over 500 Australian PREPARE couples, with a view to identifying areas for work with conflicted premarital couples. These areas for work are not based on biased speculation but are identified by means of careful investigation of the research data. An addendum is included in which the relevance of this material (the study is based on Version 2000 data) to the new Customized Version is described. The cost is only $12 and this includes postage and GST. To order this booklet call (02) 9545 4566 or email us at info@prepare-enrich.com.au ENCOURAGING NEW ADMINISTRATORS - NOW CALLED FACILITATORS Please let your colleagues know about PREPARE-ENRICH and tell them about our website (www.prepare-enrich.com.au). On that site they can read information about all the Customized Version materials and resources. By clicking on the training link on the Facilitators/Administrators' homepage, they can locate a Customized Version workshop or find contact details for a Trainer in their area. PLEASE MAKE USE OF OUR HINTS ON THE WEB We are strongly committed to helping you to work as competently as possible with the PREPARE-ENRICH materials. Periodically, we place a brief (usually one page) article focusing on a matter or theme that is likely to be helpful to PREPARE-ENRICH administrators/facilitators. Sometimes this is a brief summary of relevant research, sometimes a practical suggestion, and sometimes a way of thinking about couples' issues. It is good to get into the habit of reading these hints. The current hint can be accessed from the Administrators' main page, and an archive of all the previous hints posted is at: Any updated news items are also included. |
| Editor: Dr. Alan Craddock, National Coordinator of Prepare-Enrich (Australia). |